Understanding Your Nervous System and Feeling Safer Through the Fertility Journey
Trauma, Triggers, and Trying to Conceive by Gwen Gould is the first book in The Conscious Conception Series, an eight-book series supporting women and couples through the emotional, physical and psychological experience of fertility, conception and the transition toward parenthood. Book 1 focuses on understanding nervous-system responses, trauma triggers, freeze responses, communication, choice and ways of feeling safer during fertility investigations, treatment, waiting and uncertainty.
By Gwen Gould · Paperback · 162 pages
A gentle, practical guide
Fertility care can ask a great deal of your body as well as your mind.
Appointments, blood tests, scans, examinations and procedures can sometimes bring reactions that feel difficult to understand. You may notice tension, numbness, heightened alertness, overwhelm, difficulty speaking up, or a sense of disconnect from what is happening.
Earlier experiences can shape how the nervous system responds to the medical, emotional and intimate demands of trying to conceive.
This gentle, practical guide helps you understand those responses and explore ways of feeling safer, more present and more able to make choices about your care.
It is written in clear, warm, jargon-free language so you can take what feels useful, leave what does not, and move at your own pace.
“Take what helps. Leave what doesn’t. Go slowly.”
Find your fit
This book is for women and couples at any stage of the fertility journey.
You may be:
It may be particularly helpful if appointments, examinations or procedures leave you feeling tense, numb, overwhelmed, highly alert, unable to speak up, or disconnected from what is happening.
The book is designed to support understanding and emotional wellbeing alongside appropriate medical or therapeutic care.
A closer look inside
Explore why the nervous system can react strongly during fertility care, and why a reaction is never a personal failure.
You will begin to notice how your body communicates safety, uncertainty and threat, and how earlier experiences may influence present-day responses.
The freeze response can happen when the nervous system feels overwhelmed or unable to act.
The book explores why this may occur during scans, examinations, blood tests or other procedures, and offers a compassionate way of understanding what your body may be trying to do.
The book introduces the window of tolerance and polyvagal-informed ideas as maps for self-understanding.
They are not presented as diagnoses. Instead, they offer ways of noticing different nervous-system states and becoming more curious about what may help you feel steadier, safer or more connected.
You will be guided to notice situations, sensations, words or experiences that may activate a strong response.
The aim is not to avoid everything difficult, but to become more aware of what affects you and what may help.
It can be difficult to speak up when you feel frightened, frozen or overwhelmed.
The book helps you think about your preferences, boundaries and communication needs so you can begin creating a clearer plan for appointments and procedures.
The book introduces gentle somatic ideas including titration and pendulation.
These approaches involve noticing difficult sensations in manageable amounts and moving attention between challenge and greater ease. They are offered as gentle practices for self-awareness, not as treatment or a replacement for therapy.
Nervous systems do not regulate in isolation.
Movement, supportive relationships, connection and co-regulation may all play a role in helping you feel more grounded. The book explores how these ideas can support both you and your partner through the fertility journey.
The final part of the book brings the ideas together in a practical 30-day action plan.
Rather than trying to change everything at once, you can choose small steps that feel manageable and relevant to your own experience.
“Take what helps. Leave what doesn’t. Go slowly.”
More about Book 1
Fertility treatment can involve medical procedures, examinations, uncertainty, loss of control and emotionally intense experiences. For some people, these situations may activate strong nervous-system responses, particularly if they connect with earlier experiences.
This book explores these responses in a compassionate, educational way without assuming that everyone will experience fertility care in the same way.
Freeze is one possible nervous-system response to feeling overwhelmed, threatened or unable to act.
During a fertility procedure, this might feel like going quiet, becoming very still, feeling numb or finding it difficult to speak up.
The book helps you understand this response without judgement and explore ways of preparing for situations that may feel difficult.
No.
The book is for women and couples at any stage of the fertility journey, including investigation, trying to conceive, fertility treatment, waiting and uncertainty.
IVF is only one possible part of that wider experience.
No.
The book does not claim that stress, anxiety or trauma causes fertility difficulties.
Its purpose is to help readers understand their emotional and nervous-system responses while navigating fertility care.
Polyvagal-informed ideas are used in the book as a way of thinking about nervous-system states, safety, connection and protection.
They are offered as a framework for self-understanding rather than as a diagnosis or medical treatment.
No.
The book is for education and emotional support and is not a substitute for medical, psychological or therapeutic care.
About the author
Gwen Gould is the author of The Conscious Conception Series and founder of From Fertility to First Steps.
She is a retired NHS midwife and nurse, clinical hypnotherapist, RTT® Practitioner and EFT Specialist, with more than 35 years of NHS experience.
Her work brings together clinical experience, emotional support and practical education for women navigating fertility, pregnancy, birth and early parenthood.
Gwen’s experience includes:
On YouTube
The Conscious Conception Lab is Gwen Gould’s fertility-focused YouTube channel.
It explores themes connected with fertility, emotional wellbeing, nervous-system awareness and the wider Conscious Conception approach.
Visit The Conscious Conception Lab on YouTube, opens in a new tabEight books, one wider journey
The Conscious Conception Series is an eight-book series by Gwen Gould exploring the emotional, psychological and practical experience of fertility, conception and the transition toward parenthood.
Each book focuses on a particular part of the journey and offers education, reflection and practical support while remaining clear about the boundaries between self-help, medical care and therapeutic support.
Book 1
Understanding Your Nervous System and Feeling Safer Through the Fertility Journey
Further books in the series will explore additional aspects of the fertility and conception journey.
The wider work
Expert emotional and clinical support from a retired NHS midwife, helping women across the UK navigate fertility, pregnancy, birth and postpartum with greater understanding and confidence.
100% online via Zoom · Available UK-wide
C.Hyp · RTT® Practitioner · EFT Specialist · Hypnobirthing Instructor
